presents--all for me--all in the name of love

I love my husband. That is not always a "given" in a relationship and so I am grateful.

The reason why I am spouting on about my feelings for him is that today he brought me home a present. It didn't cost him anything and it was all the better that it didn't.*

He knows me well and knows that spending time outdoors is one of the things that makes my fur lie flat. He has been going out in the hills and walking while I am at work. I am not jealous of this--I am in fact very glad that he is getting out of the house and getting exercise. It would not do to waste all the fitness that we found for ourselves during the winter months. (During the week I have to make do with the stationary bike and my yoga ball...That's OK too because I can catch up on Gray's Anatomy and House while I sweat.)

Anyway, Shuji brought this video back from his latest solo excursion. It was a taste of Spring with all its creatures great and small that is waiting for me until I can get out into it again.

*He also brought me home this bit of monkey poo a few weeks ago. I am not especially fond of monkey poo. Certainly it does not warm my heart like the voices of the "kajika" frogs in the video. But he could not catch the monkeys on film, so he did the next best thing. It makes me feel good that he knows me well enough and that our relationship is stable enough for him to (without hesitation) bring me a photo of poo.

knowing how to have a good time--Happy Golden Week 2011

We are all products of our environment--that is to the extent that we cannot say "NO" to those voices from our past that creep into the back (or front) of our minds as we live our daily lives. Even though I am in my forties, even though I live half a world away from the people who raised me, even though I have learned to ignore most of the little things--some tidbits of advice, parental mantras or family obsessions remain and surface from time to time.

Tonight I was drying my hair and as I looked in the mirror I thought "My gran would not like this hairstyle (cut, length, style)."

It is not like it matters. She will certainly not see me and even if she did I would be able to say politely that I am sorry she does not like it or something akin to that and would not need to get testy back. I have, at least, grown up that much. But it is amusing how much we want approval from our elders and how we (or at least I used to) glow when we get a pat on the head.

I remember this same gran saying once how Shuji and I sure know how to have a good time. This was in comparison to an aunt and uncle who in her eyes did not have this desirable trait. In my eyes, the aunt and the uncle are happy. They get along well and are very supporting of and loving with one another. But I guess that isn't enough.

Well, she is right. Shuji and I certainly know how to enjoy ourselves...

coming up for air

Ever since I was a small child I have needed a lot of sleep. I was never one of those hard to deal with, night-owl kids who drove their parents insane begging for glasses of water or cookies at midnight. I was the child who sat rubbing fists into her bleary eyes and asked permission to go to bed. I am still that way. I have not been able to get all the sleep I wanted this week and have been cranky because of it. (Anyone with a child who reads this will surely thing of me as soft, I know. I realize that I have nothing to whine about in my sheltered, childless state.)

But our crisis here is exhausting too.

On top of it came the beginning of Spring Semester and all its madness. I went to bed last night at 9:30 and slept till 8:00. All that shut eye (and getting so much done during the week) did a lot to make me feel better.  I cannot really do anything about what is going on in the north. I am weary of all the news and frightened by the lack of useful information as well as the lack of progress with the stupid reactors.
 But in spite of all this and all the suffering that I know is being felt, the rest of Japan cannot stop living and working and trying to feel normal.

Yesterday on the way to a school event (yes I had to work on Saturday. That's yet another reason why I needed so much catch up sleep) we saw our local family of swans out on the irrigation canal where they have built their nest. On the way back we stopped and took some photos. The photos are not great, but the mom and the birds were so sweet--with the wee little ones climbing on her back to stay warm and safe (this is a better view of how that works). That and the new green leaves and the gorgeous cherry blossoms that we have had have lifted my spirits a bit.