A Sense of Home

Last night I saw a recap on Japan's equivalent of PBS of a film festival that took place last week. I love film and have been to a couple of local film festivals over the years and I was really sad that I had missed this one.

the screen was handmade by the local elem. students

I felt sad not only because I had missed seeing some really cool shorts (all of the films were 3.11 minutes long to commemorate the earthquake/tsunami disaster on 3/11 and the showing took place on 9.11 to offer recognition to the tragedy on that date ten years ago.) but also because it would have been absolutely amazing to have gone to the venue. It was shown at one of the holiest places (to me) in the region where I used to live. These photos give a sense of what it would have been like, even if you don't understand Japanese.

Actually, it broke my heart not to be able to go. It has been 2 years and 6 months since we moved and I do like it here. It is so better in so many ways than where we were in terms of location and also in terms of where we are in our life and our marriage. But I lived in Kansai for 21 years and all of my old haunts are there. We are making good, new memories and traditions down here in Kyushu, but it hurts to see the fond and familiar so far out of reach. And it broke my heart to know that there is no one who would understand how much I miss this particular place--except for Shuji and even he doesn't get it because it is just another very Japanese place that I used to drag him to to walk and hike and bike all the time.

So, I stole the title for this post from the name of the film fest. But it fits. I am still trying to find a sense of home. There will always be longing for my birth country, or my adopted Kansai and then when we eventually leave here we will mourn for Miyazaki too I suppose. I hope we don't stay here long enough to get that attached...

'nuff said.